Thank you! You've helped us get our kung fu back.
Thanks for coming back!
Thank you!
Don't be like this.
I'm the one that should be thanking all you guys.
Oh, my God! I'm going to be rich! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
We've failed. Please give us an opportunity to join your team
Please! Please!
Please, give us a chance.
It's a pretty big risk.
The Evil Team'll be the champion in the world.
Who?
The lame?
Why not? -I'm sorry.
I've already played soccer for many years,
You want to stop me? -The person in charge is not here now.
What are you doing?
Hung! -Hung, he...
Okay...
Hung, my team wants to sign up for the soccer game!
It's an open competition. Everyone has the right to sign up.
You're wrong.
I'm the chairman.
I've the right to decide who can sign it up.
Do you understand? -Yes.
What's the name of your team?
Come on!
This is Hung.
Hung!
This is a rare soccer team!
I really want to watch them play soccer.
What's the name again? This is the Shaolin...
OK...
Go sign up so I can watch them.
If you need, I can pay for your application fee. -Thank you!
It's okay! You guys, the lame is my friendly brother.
My shoe is dirty again.
White shoes are easy to get dirty.
So...
I'll help you clean it up!
I'm good at cleaning. Let me try!
This is my duty!
Hey! Let me try!
Hi!
What are you doing?
Who are you?
Where are we going?
Why are you so quiet? I need to go home.
I've been waiting a long time. -I'm sorry to keep you waiting.
Try this.
No. I just want to see the quality of it.
Touch it.
I'll make it dirty.
No problem. Go ahead. -No...
Touch it. -No.
How about that? -So smooth.
I'll buy one for you. -I touched it already. It's enough.
Tomorrow, I'll go to play soccer.
Really?
I must become a famous star player.
But if you hadn't helped me to repair them...
I wouldn't be playing soccer.
You know, you're so important to me.
Tell me what you want.
I can buy it for you very soon.
If you become rich and famous, please buy me some sneakers.
No problem!
But you should have self-confidence.
Actually, you're a beautiful girl good at kung fu.
You know, you are perfect.
You can't let your hair down and cover your face like that.
Come on.
Come on. Look at me. -No...
Look at me!
Look. So beautiful!
Really?
Yes, of course.
Is it a fly? Yes. But I didn't catch it.
Did you catch it? I did.
I'm sorry. I made your hand dirty.
No problem.
You know, you're a most beautiful girl.
Do you know that? -Yes, I do.
Thank you! Thanks so much!
Do you know?
Hey! Where'd you go?
I let you bring a girl here because you promised me you'd clean the store.
Hurry up! If you don't finish the work on time, I'll be in trouble.
Go home. I'll call you later.
Okay?
Remember! You should have confidence. You're the best.
I like your shirt. -I like your socks too.
Let's trade. -Good...
Hey, guys! This is important! Just play like you've trained.
There'll be hundreds of reporters and spectators outside.
You guys should keep smiling for the cameras.
You also need to say "Hi" and give thanks for the audience's support.
Thank you! Thank you Thank you!
Thanks for your support!
Thank you!
They're just cleaners.
Cleaners are also the audience.
Thank you!
Shut up!
This stadium is so small and empty. You said...
This is just the first round.
So we should play well and get into the finals.
Great! Get into the finals! -Shut up!
Shaolin Team?
Look at this guy!
Look at that guy!
What happened?
It's impossible! Just an illusion!
What are you doing?
It's okay, just an illusion.
I think we should show off our real power.
Great!
What's wrong?
Please don't play like this! I really want to play soccer!
Hung, it's your call.
I'm not scared. It's just an illusion.
What? Forty to nothing?
Yeah!
Got a goal! lron Head! Iron Head!
Yes, we use Shaolin kung fu to play soccer.
So kung fu is great, wonderful!
We lie low...\-And...
I thank my parents and my Shaolin master.
Even though they've died already.
I want to thank my good friend, Mui.
Mui...How are you?
Did you have your dinner already?
Hi! Can I help?
I want... I understand. Let me help you
Show us your kung fu?
Yes, of course, Sixth Small Brother.
1, 2, 3!
Great!
Can you show us one more?
Sure! -Big Brother, one more please.
Take it easy!
My Brothers,
today we achieve victory with our old sneakers.
Don't throw anything here!
Sorry. Sorry
Mui?
What's up?
You look so cute!
Not really.
No. You're very heavily made up.
Do you like it?
I've got good news for you.
You know my soccer team won the matches easily.
I know. I watched you guys on TV.
Congratulations!
For you.
Thank you.
Come on. Let me introduce you to my friends.
Wow! How great this is!
This is my friend...
Are you a human or a ghost?
Oh, no! She's my...
- She's your girl. - No!
She's my friend, Mui. She uses Tai Chi to make streamed bread.
Oh! She's the one.
She's a rare girl. -Yes, she's a rare girl.
I can see that.
There is a long piece of wood placed on her shoulder. I've never see that before.
I spent two whole nights making these two pieces.
Two pieces.
Sing, it's not good for you to bring her out at night.
Someone will be frightened to death.
It doesn't matter. Maybe we can perform ceremonies for them.
Hold on! We can tie her up and throw her into the sea.
Don't you think you'll want to eat seafood again sometime?
No kidding! It's no good to treat a girl like this.
It's okay. I don't care.
Even though she's a soft and gentle girl, she loves joking.
Mui, please make a sexy pose.
Can't you do better than that?
- What's wrong? - Don't touch me!
Are you angry with me?
No, I'm not.
So you're...
I'm sorry.
I'm only joking.
I know you just like to make fun of me.
I'm sorry. Actually, I don't care.
Don't be like this.
So why did you do this to me?
Don't touch me!
Boss...
What's wrong with you? I just went to play Mahjong...
You see, you don't look like a human or a ghost.
Don't you feel embarrassed?
Enough already!
Mui has the right to decide how she looks.
Can't you respect her decision?
I think she's quite nice today.
Don't you think she's beautiful? -You talk too much!
It's none of your business.
You're not qualified to talk to me like this.
They're my friends.
They're talking about what they think to be my true feelings.
I think I'm quite beautiful right now.
I love my new look a lot.
If you don't like this, you can leave immediately.
Hey! Do you know whom you're speaking with?
I'm speaking with you.
A cool boss.
Shit!
You... are you brave enough to fight with me?
Do you want to rebel against me?
Who are you?
It's me.
I'm Mui!
I'm going to tell your Mom.
Mui, you're great!
Mui, we're just joking. Please don't get mad at us.
Actually, your pose was so great.
Really?
I think...
I think I'm a little bit different now.
Truly.
You've more confidence than before.
I want to tell you something.
What's up?
I like you!
I like you, too!
Is this love?
You...
You're kidding.
No. I'm serious.
Absolutely not. This is not love.
We're friends forever...
Don't you think it's good for us?
Okay! It's fine.
So you'll come to see me often?
If your shoes are broken, I'll help you to repair them again.
No, thanks. If my shoes are broken, I'll just throw them away.
We should look forward to our future.
I'll never wear any broken shoes again.
Don't be like this.
What's wrong? You're crying?
Don't do this.
I understand.
Thank you!
Come here!
Mui, you look lovely today. Cheers!
After winning this, we'll go to the finals.
The finals!
But we can't underestimate our opponent! -Our opponent!
We're the most powerful team.
I won't let you get into the finals.
Oh, my God! How come?
It's the special effects? -Good Morning Hung!
Good morning!
Come here! You're a lucky guy.
You're so lucky to get this great team. -Thank you.
Actually, lron Head and lron Shirt are just street performers.
It's amusing for you guys to use kung fu to play soccer,
and then to get into the finals.
You did a good job.
Hey! Don't waste our time!
Give up the finals and join my Evil Team!
Hey, it's not a bribe.
You can get the money before signing with me.
It's a lot of money.
I can probably break my left leg and then retire.
Sure! We're brothers.
Thank you.
But I don't think I can take it.
What? Do you think I'm afraid of you?
I think your team has great potential. So maybe we can join together.
Don't be so easily upset. Think about your future.
Forget the hostility. Okay?
Hung, I didn't keep the hostility in mind.
I know it was all my fault. I couldn't blame anyone.
You're lying!
I know you too well. You're so greedy!
You're right!
I'm so greedy. My team is greedy, too.
But we're not greedy for money.
We're greedy for the championship.
See you on the soccer field.
Mui!
She died already!
How come?
I killed her!
Oh, no! Mui is the Master Hand of Tai Chi.
You treated her unfairly!
What do you want?
Revenge!
Don't be silly! It's just a joke!
She's still alive. She just doesn't work here.
Why not?
You know, my stall is well known for its sweet bread..
But now the steamed bread has become salty and bitter.
She has ruined my business.
I don't have a choice but to let her go.
Salty and bitter? Yes.
What's your name? Can I help?
No, thanks.
It's time to go!
Boss, how many goals do we need today?
Scoring goals is not the only way to win.
I have a new way to win.
This American medication is wonderful!
Actually the referee, linesman,
soccer association, soccer federation and soccer committee,
all stand on my side.
How can they fight against me?
No problem!
Great! -Fit!
Wonderful!
Throw-in?
He did it on purpose.
How could you judge it to be a throw-in?
Hung, are you fighting or playing soccer?
Fighting. So what?
I should break all you guys' legs and let you become cripples.
Cripples! Cripples!
You're fighting with me now?
I'm sorry. I should take a break.
It's okay. You'll just physically leave us,
but your spirit will remain with us.
Bend over! It's my turn.
Sixth Small Brother!
What's wrong? Why don't you stop it?
You're all injured in just the first half. How can you play the rest of the game?
Go home! No way you can play the second half!
We'll be back!
Maybe I can go down and dance in a show.
No! It's not your turn. It's mine!
Bullshit!
Get out!
You guys don't want to play anymore!
Who did it?
Did anyone see it?
Hit me in the face, if you're brave enough!
Rub gently.
I can't imagine they're more lawless than I am.
I can't believe that...
my reputation is ruined.
I knew they were up to something,
but I never imagined anything like this.
The Evil Team isn't that good.
They're taking some kind of drug.
Call the police!
Anyway, we should try our best to keep going.
We'll win in the end!
My house is on fire. I need to run!
I'm sorry. My mom is giving birth right now.
I should go home and take care of her.
Ask her to wait.
You can't give up!
They're not playing soccer. They're killing us!
I beg you. Please don't leave us!
I beg you back.
Please let me go!
Calm down! Calm Down!
Yes, he's right!
We should keep going.
Now we have just eight players.
If there is one more injury, we'll fail.
We must try our best to fight for the killer kick.
How come? If you fight for one killer kick, I'll fight for three.
What are you talking about?
Calm down! Calm down!
I'm not sure if I have the strength.
Shaolin Lou Han Array!
Array?
Can't stand for a shot!
Are you okay? -I'm fine!
Chun! -Tin? -Yes.
I want to tell you something I've never told you before,
Chun, I love you!
Do you think we're too cruel?
I don't think so! -Really?
So we can be harsher.
Brothers! Go!
What?
Be careful!
Watch out!
Shit!
Hurry up! Don't act injured!
You're so smart! I'm fine.
Time is almost out! Use the final attack!
Final attack?
It's useless for you guys to stall for time.
Win!
Shaolin Team.
Now you have just seven players.
If you don't have any more substitutes,
I'll stop the game and you'll forfeit.
Any substitute players?
Congratulations. -Thank you.
My turn!
I'm the substitute player.
I'm the goalkeeper.
Why did you make up as E.T.?
I don't know how to cut my hair, so it was better that I shaved it.
For what?
I want to help you.
How can you do that?
Go back to Mars.
The Earth is too dangerous.
I really want to help you. Trust me. Let me try.
No way! -You see, your shoes are broken again.
Put these on.
The opposite side.
Go!
Great!
Watch out!
What happened?
Boss, watch out! -Damn it!
Boss!
Shaolin wins the championship.
The Evil Team used drugs. Permanent suspension.
Leader Hung sentenced to 5 years in jail.
Wait! Stop it!
Go back to to Mars. The Earth is too dangerous.
My trades are hundreds of thousand dollars each.
How can you guys...
Don't laugh!
The prize is so great...
My real occupation is as a post-graduate student.
Post-graduate student?
Post-graduate student.
What are you doing? -Don't touch me!
Are you mad at me?
No, I'm not. Why should I be mad at you?
- What's wrong? - Don't touch me!
Are you mad at me?
No, I'm not.
Don't!
I beg you. Please don't force me.
Don't!
Great! I can't even understand one sentence... Sorry!
Just cleaners.
Cleaners are also an audience.
I heard you've a terrific leg.
This crescent wrench...
...is used to hold for turning bolts.
Yes...
Our team is greedy, too.
We're not greedy for money, but for this air... ticket.
Air ticket? Are you leaving?
Chun, it's Tin.
I've kept a secret in my mind for twenty years.
I love you.
I'm not Chun. I'm Kung.
Kung, I'm sorry.
Please tell your wife what I've just told you.
Thank you!